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Tragedyriffic!
WARNING: Parental Discretion IS ADVISED. THE FOLLOWING IS EXTREMELY INSENSITIVE AND SHOULD NOT BE VIEWED BY ANYONE, EVER. Original Tragedy graphic is Copywright Cole Hogan, 2006. Modified graphic and...
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That’s just like the 9/11 of…
The following is a list of the most awesome uses of the simile this article gets its title from. Also, everyone’s favorite tragedy, except for Cole Hogan. A bad week in Queercasting, or Heath Ledger’s...
View ArticleAREA PESSIMIST SPEAKS OUT AGAINST MAIN MAN, CANDY LAND
More on this story as it develops.
View ArticleSnitch Ass Cops Bust Marijuana Martyrs
WILMINGTON–Several college students at UNCW were arrested for doing some things that don’t even exist, that is, ‘intent to manufacture marijuana.’ Police Chief Entirely Fictional explained, “They were...
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Surfin’ USA
Our right to privacy extends only as far as our ability to protect it since technological advancement and the government have joined hands against us. The right to privacy will be as void for humanity...
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Reporting live from inside Gaia Online
Gaia is great because it is full of people who just can’t seem to get a grip on real life at all. With all its fantasy role-playing, cliquishness, inside jokes, and the unending affection of total...
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Chuck in 2012
Killer, presidential candidate Manson, 2009 Charles Manson: due to be released in the year 2012, the world-famous serial killer is up for his twelfth parole hearing on the final notch in the Mayan...
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This just in
Armed cattlemen gather to wrangle up sheep-like capital resource Our generation is doomed to the cooperation of all distributors of every major known resource in a valiant effort to turn a buck on the...
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Peace on Earth a reality after worldwide cooperation leads to groundbreaking...
Children of all ages lined up in front of their schools today only to learn that classes were canceled indefinitely. A victory every man can taste Professors of social sciences, military advisers to...
View ArticleGaia Economy in Shambles
Gaia Online has suffered extreme hyperinflation in the past weeks, as the value of gold plummeted. The crux of Gaia’s economy is a steady flow of art-themed posting. Poetry, photography, and art of all...
View ArticleNoggin
Head. Fellatio. Hummer. Blowjob. Going down. Tooting the horn. Playing the skin flute. Smoking the pole. Polishing the knob. Addressing the court. No matter what you call it, we all love it. If you can...
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Why Hussein Is Fucking America
As we all know, Barack Hussein Obama has purposefully begun his career by attacking America’s core values and principles with his decree to allow baby-killings, gay marriages, and practice of Islam....
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Neighborhood Puzzled By Shoe-Wearing Power Line
LAKE PARK, IL.–Area citizens were baffled this week when a local power line was spotted wearing a pair of shoes. The shoes appeared to be slightly worn, Nike® Air Jordan’s, and were first spotted...
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Richmond Mayor forces two children to fight
Mayor Jones is seen here applying force on two reluctant boys' pressure-points Richmond, VA–Mayor Dwight C. Jones (Mister C.) allegedly forced two children to duel for their lives Monday following...
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FEAR NOTHING
We live in the time of now. We die tomorrow. But we weren’t born yesterday. Resist the illusion of freedom now and truly confine yourself as an outlaw in the shadows of uprising. Voting is weak, and...
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A Grad Student Who Knew Too Much
Berkey, at the start of our daylong interview. On a brisk October morning in Brookline, a graduate student announced that he was an expert at something, to the total indifference of his friends, peers...
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Welcome to Roanoke, Virginia
Roanoke is situated on the Roanoke River, which forms a valley in the Blue Ridge Mountains of Southwest Virginia. The Appalachian trail and the Blue Ridge parkway pass through, bringing in tourists....
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Tea Party fanatic opens fire on the 99%
Monday, a Tea Party member distinguished himself as a true fanatic for America by opening fire on a crowd of the ’99%’ protesters. In a crazed rant posted on youtube, the man referred to the massacre...
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Official English VDARE Sullies American English, Warns of Rubio Menace
WASHINGTON – Last month, columnist John Derbyshire talked himself out of his long-held National Review post by pouring napalm on the heated Trayvon Martin-George Zimmerman controversy. Despite Mr....
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EXCLUSIVE VIDEO ESSAY: The Paula Broadwell Stakeout
Politico led with Broadwell imbibing ethanol (Via the Associated Press) WASHINGTON – Early Tuesday, U.S. News & World Report relayed that the driver’s license of Paula Broadwell, mistress and...
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